Words are flying out like endless rain into a paper cup .



I have been trying to catch the wind.
In my life, I have caught the oceans, and I have caught the mountains.
The oceans once crashed at my feet. Lapping my toes and caressing my skin. I lived under the ocean once I had caught it and I was amazed that something that looked so one dimensional on the surface hid such treasures, such colour, such life. The ocean was the first to introduce me to the Euphoria. In the ocean I could travel up down round and round and it would caress me, wet me, love me...But after a time...the tides...the waves...the weeds...the bubbles, I began to lose my way, began to feel ill, began to become afraid like when you look down into the deep and dark grey sea and you see nothing nothing nothing...your heart beats and that is all. And you know not what your heart beat calls. But you are sure, sure in your panic, that it...will...hurt.
I climbed out of the sea. Coughing and crying and bruised and broken.
Land! It's wide arms open ready to receive me, believe me, reprieve me. Land under my feet as far as I could see, so that no matter how high or how low or how far I travelled, Land was there. Always there, always supporting me. Taking me on its shoulders so that I might still see in the distance the sea and the air above and the fire that had ravaged it. And I began to despise all fire for this Land was my Euphoria and I would not abide it being ravaged. And I ran my hands through it's grass, and I held it's rocks in my palms and I traced the curves, the contours of its body and I had never before seen such complexity, and in that, such beauty.
And over time, I explored Land. Until, I knew every inch and every crevasse and every peak.
And I began to look up. And I saw the eternity of the sky above me.
That was when I first felt it tickle the back of my neck.
The wind.
So I lifted my arms up high nigh on a year ago. I lifted my arms up and I let my feet fall upward and the wind wrapped itself around me and lifted me up and I was...flying...and...this was Euphoria, this was Euphoria and i screamed in delight It vanished and I fell.
No land no water no wind, just falling and black and worse than the water and drier than the land I fell......until......the familiar prickle on the back of my neck once more and once again its arms gripped me tight and carried me skyward...the wind the wind the feather light wind...
and let go...
This repeated and I grew addicted until I, in my madness, began to think of ways to catch the wind.
A sail? A sock?
A cage? A lock?
Tossing and turning a captive of the wind, my body was lost and my mind raced to keep up with the beating of my heart but could not match its pace and so eventually my mind gave in, gave in...
and my heart spoke:
Do not try to catch the wind.
Enjoy its breath, enjoy its adventures, its tickle, its laughter, its caress as it travels, breezes past you.
Marvel at it. Then return to where you belong.
Or better yet.
Face the Fire.
And following that, The Void.

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